Mercy is a virtue that is easy to fake. It is also a struggle to achieve true mercy. Many Christians convince themselves that they have been merciful towards their neighbours when they say a few pious words and a seemingly heart-felt prayer or give their neighbour some needed food, money, and time . This is not to say that these “works of mercy” are insufficient. Often, kind actions are sufficient. They soothe the soul of a suffering neighbour and makes both the giver and the receiver feel blessed. But the beatitudes are not merely telling Christians to do about external acts of kindness, the beatitudes ask that we receive Christ’s love and Christ’s mind, that we become like Christ in our innermost being.

How, then, are we to be truly merciful in the depths of our souls? Well, let’s consider what mercy is not? What are the counterfeits of mercy?

A merciful person does not have an angry or judgmental “I told her so” attitude. Many people find it hard to be compassionate towards a drug-addict or an alcoholic. They reason that the substance abuser should have known better. They believe the sufferer was arrogant, ignorant, lazy or presumptuous and “got himself into a mess” despite good advice. This opinion is often very true. Many people, young and old, know the risk of some behaviour but truly believe they will escape some sin or behaviour unscathed. But the Bible does not tell us to wash our hands and say “I would never have ended up in that position.” Whether the person’s problem is self-created or not, the heart of the Christian is supposed to be sympathetic enough to say, “How would I be feeling if I were in this situation?”

True, it is very hard for some Christians to believe that they will ever need mercy. These self-sufficient Christians often tell themselves that “God helps those who help themselves.” They believe they earned everything in their lives by their own power. These Christians have forgotten the kindness given to them by other people. Other Christians reason that they are actually rather good, people. Almost sinless, in fact. In fact, they can’t remember sinning anytime within the last two or three years. And if they have ever sinned, (they say) the sin surely was not as bad as the sins of some other folks they know. In truth, these Christians, often do not understand the goodness of God and the deceitfulness of their human heart. In the Lord’s Prayer, Jesus told us to pray “Forgive us our sin as we forgive those who sin against us.” It is well to remember this when we think about being merciful. Of course, some Christians simply cannot be merciful because they assume mercy is only for extreme cases. Yes, God is loving and calls His children to repent and to be forgiven, but after we are saved by God’s grace, we cannot be so presumptuous as to believe that we will be forgiven for our sins simply God wants to forgive us. As the parable of the unforgiving steward warns us, the person who will not forgive others will not receive forgiveness from God. A Christian is God’s child but he is also the brother of God’s children and is in relationship to other humans on earth. Love covers many of our sins.

Other people simply cannot commiserate with the sorrows of those they envy. St Paul told us that we should “Rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep.” Many Christians are unable to do this. First, it is a given that not all Christians like each other. It is very difficult to weep when something bad has happened to someone we do not like, or to sad if something unfortunate happens to someone who has wronged us. As for rejoicing in the joys of others, the sin of coveting is still very much with us. Many Christians often compare their own lives with the lives of other people and secretly envy the joys their neighbours receive. Consider the following scenario: Let us say Winnifred has four or five friends she regularly associates with. Two of these friends are slender people. Winnifred and the other two are pretty girls but slightly overweight. Soon, however, one of the overweight friends is told that she must lose weight because her health is endangered. She manages to lose the excess weight. What happens? Winnifred may choose to rejoice in her friend’s joy. After all, her friend is now healthier. Or she may feel slightly envious that her friend has succeeded where she has failed. Even worse, if her friend begins gaining back a few of these pounds, Winnifred might actually feel a bit of envious joy that her friend has begun to fail. The upshot is this: Being merciful, especially to those whom we do not particularly like can be difficult. Often, God is the only one who knows the struggle behind our mercy. But if we are to be like Christ, we must unlock our hearts and learn to love those who are better off and worse off than we are.

So, what is mercy? Mercy is showing love, care and kindness to someone who needs it. Mercy is patient and tolerant with the suffering of others. Mercy listens to the grief of others without judging. Mercy hopes for the best. And Mercy is committed. A merciful person doesn’t just dabble. He walks the long road with the sufferer.

It is often very difficult to believe that God will repay us in kind. But in the beatitudes, Jesus tells us that there is a connection between what we do on earth and what happens in our lives, now and later in heaven. Here we see that rewards of mercy are many. We become more like Christ. And by using our earthly mammon and our kind hearts to help others, we not only gain the love and joy of friends who will greet us gratefully and joyously into heavenly mansions, but we enable God to be merciful towards us in this life and the next.